French Toast Girl

Please, try a pee

As I had been steadily losing my voice* for the past few weeks due to the constant repetition of key phrases and the high volume in which I have to yell to make myself heard, Paul has made me a couple of handy recordings. This is my favorite one. (The other so far is "Please clear the table." I'm also hoping for the combo "Go try a pee and put on your pajamas".) Please feel free to download it and use it in your house. The secret is to loop it so that they HAVE to go try a pee to so that you will make it stop.

Enjoy!

PleaseTryAPee.mp3

*voice is getting better, thanks

Labels: creativity, family, kids, motherhood

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A question from Sophie (and other Friday diversions)

Quick Friday thoughts as I make this cake for the twins' birthday party tomorrow:

♥ Sophie wants to know, "Is a toilet a machine?" I say yes. What do you think?

♥ We have been singing this song non-stop at our house and if you play this, I bet you will too: The Bellybutton Song. We have learned not to let the kids see this before they go to bed, because they were singing, "Belly button! Uh-UH!" back and forth between their rooms for a FULL HOUR after they were supposed to be asleep. (Our babysitter made us play it twice and then bought it on iTunes.)

♥ And YAY! Loobylu is back!

Labels: diversions, family, kids

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Go ahead, make a fairy!

Angela checks out some fairies having some downtime at Sophie's birthday party.

I haven't had a chance to write about the birthdays (Sophie's, and Peter and Angela's), the RAINBOW birthday party with giggly 5-year-olds, or the twins' birthday party coming up. So here's a start: the craft we did at Sophie's birthday. We made clothespin fairies! Totally fun, doesn't have to make a mess, and easy for little hands to make. And after you've made your fairy, you can go have an adventure together!

You need:
* wooden clothespins (not the kind with the spring!)
* pipe cleaners
* crepe paper (we used streamers, they're the perfect size for dresses)
* waxed paper to cut out for wings
* markers/crayons/paints
* yarn or a toothpick for a wand
* any other fun details - sequins, glitter, flowers

Here are the instructions - and note - Petey's fairy had no dress, and a wand that shot flames! This does not have to be a girly craft, and naturally you can adopt this to make anything your kids want. Print this out and send it with extra supplies to a friend who's home sick from school or lives far away. So go! Have fun! And please, if you make fairies, send me the pictures or post a link to them, we want to see them!

*Note: I have to confess, we had another round of fairy-making this afternoon, and I started two (uh, for me!) with glitter-watercolours. When they're finished we'll take all of them in the backyard and have a photo shoot!

Labels: crafts, fairies, family, kids

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valentines

I've been pretty sick this past week (unfinished paintings languishing on my art table) but nothing was going to keep me from doing our yearly valentine. Check out the cuties from years past:

(2007)

(2006)

(2005)

And have a wonderful Valentine's Day!

Labels: family, kids

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Illustration Friday: Blanket

Coffee, glitter, watercolour, and bits of photocopied fairytale. Can you tell which one it is?

All three of my kids take books and a flashlight to bed. Wonder where they got that from (ponders the mama with stacks of books next to her bed, a booklight, and a battery recharger)? Hmmmmmmmm?

Labels: coffee, illustration friday, kids, watercolour

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Only one more sleep 'till Christmas

Wishing you and those you love a blessed Christmas and a joyous New Year! (left to right: Angela in her gorgeous pink glasses, Sophie the wondergirl, and my boy Petey Pop.)

Labels: faith, family, kids

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Sophie. Peter. Angela.

Little sketches of my kids...

Did you ever hear the story about how having kids is like having your heart walk around outside your body? That's what I think of when I look at Sophia. She's 4-and-three-quarters. She stuns me, almost every day, with something new that she comes up with. Sophie has this long long brown curly hair that she can sit on when it's wet. She's bright, inquisitive, and everything she feels shows on her face immediately. She's like a little elf, some bit of magic that I can't believe came from me because she's so totally her own quirky little self. We haven't had her tested, but we already know from others that she is Off The Charts. A typical dinner conversation with Sophie contains references to animals, her artwork, which numbers are odd and which are even, Spanish vocabulary, the 8 times table, and the workings of the central nervous system. She has begun to play the piano and have lessons from Daddy, and now plays "Jolly Old St. Nicholas", with two hands, actually reading the sheet music, with great seriousness. Then she flings herself off the bench to do the most dramatic bow ever. She tells me, "The ponytail has to flip over my head for it to be right." I could go on and on about how smart she is, how talented she is, and none of it would be good enough to explain the beautiful spark of life that she has in her heart.

The twins are 3-and-three-quarters. Peter is just such a hoot. I've read things I've written about Peter last year, and he is still so solidly Peter - so many things are the same. Peter is passionate about cooking; he wants to know everything there is to know about it. He pretends he's cooking, he takes cookbooks to bed with him, he loves nothing more than to help stir, mix, set the table... and he will gladly tell you what he likes to eat, which is pretty much everything, but tortellini is his favorite, followed very very closely by pierogies. His latest thing is for us to watch cooking how-to videos on youtube, especially the ones about how to make sushi. Not that he's ever had it, but he is completely fascinated by it. Petey is the only one in our family with blond hair, and he has these absolutely gorgeous hazel eyes (like Daddy!). He's totally going to have our phone ringing off the hook when he gets older. One of the greatest things about Peter is that he has the most awesome laugh ever - it's completely infectious. He laughs this deep deep belly laugh that sounds like it's coming from an old man, and you can't help but laugh with him, which only makes him laugh harder... He's bright, he's very very silly, and it's easy to forget sometimes that he loves to snuggle just as much as he loves to run and jump around. Here's a perfect Petey snapshot: when he has ants in his pants, he will run over to me and ask me to put on "Shake Your Tailfeather" so that he can dance it all out. (His other faves are "I Feel Good" and Rockappella's "Falling' Over You".) While I love dancing up a storm with him, I love his hugs and smooches even more.

Angela is so completely her own person. She has this gorgeous cloud of dark curly hair that she pulls on because she wants it to be longer (like Mama, like Sophie). She got glasses this year, and on Sophie they would make her look owlish, but on Angela they're pure glamour. Angela, while sweet, adorable, girly, and having a huggability rating off the charts, has a streak of pure willfulness that's making me very afraid for her teen years. One morning at the breakfast table she wanted something, like a pear, but we didn't have any and told her so. She got really angry and yelled, "But I WANT A PEAR!" Again, we said we couldn't give her something we didn't have, and how about an apple? She slumped way down in her chair and gave us the nastiest evil glare ever. Paul and I laughed so hard we almost fell under the table! It was a total fast-forward to Angela at 13, when I tell her she can't wear that skirt. I've written before about Angela and being strong-willed, so I don't want to write more about it because she really is a sweetheart. She has a great imagination and loves to play creative games; I can totally see her being an actress some day. Angela snapshot: the other morning I asked her "And how are you today?" and she said, in all seriousness, "Gorgeous." She loves to draw, and she can write all the letters of her name, although not necessarily always in order. Angela is frequently the first one up and about in the morning, and she will come into our room with her arms up in the air, huge smile on her face, singing, "Good morning! Time to get up!" And then she comes over to my side and says, "Good morning, sweet bunny!" How could you possibly ever get up and have a grumpy day after that kind of love?

When the three of them were all tiny (and they were quite tiny), everyone would tell me how blessed I was, but I was kind of too shell-shocked to agree. But now I know it, truly and fully. And I am so, so thankful for them.

Labels: family, kids, NaBloPoMo

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dear pancakes

Tell me you wouldn't love to be me this morning. ♥ (Pretty good for 4.5 years old, huh?)

Labels: family, food, kids, NaBloPoMo

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I can't make this stuff up

The other day, I was talking on the phone, when Peter starts yelling from the dining room, "Mama! Come here, look! I made a pee! I made a pee! "

I run over, and I'm starting to ream him out for peeing on the floor when he knows better, and it's hardwood, no less, and why didn't he get up and make it to the bathroom if he knew it was coming, etc. As I get to him, he has a very confused look on his face, and he hands me a piece of paper.

That he has drawn the letter P on.

Labels: family, kids

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All my silly friends

I will be one of the Silly Friends singing backup for Marc this weekend at the Hoboken Art and Music Festival. If you're in the area, bring the kids and come boogie down!

Labels: diversions, family, kids

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It could be worse

There's a story that goes like this: a man's house was so full of people that he had no room to move or do anything. So he went to a wisewoman, who told him, "Take all your goats, and bring them into the house." He went back to her a few days later and she told him, "Take all your chickens, and bring them into the house." He eventually is told to bring ALL his farm animals into the house, so he does.

Now he not only has crying babies and demanding relatives, but also dogs and pigs and ducks underfoot. The noise is horrible, the smell is worse. He can't understand why the advice isn't helping. So he goes back to the wise woman. She tells him, "Now take all your chickens, and bring them OUT of the house." He does. Eventually, all the animals are out of the house, and he's left with his relatives. They're noisy, he has no privacy and no room, but at least his house isn't full of animals. He realizes that what he had to begin with wasn't so bad after all. Because it could always be worse.

Things are kind of crazy right now at my house. Make that insane. So my mantra is: It could be worse. I'm not going to go into my list, because it's whiny and kind of morbid to write out what could be worse, but let's just say, I'm trying hard to be thankful for the blessings that I have.

I was going to ask people to write their "Could be worse" list, but instead, could you leave me a note about something you personally feel blessed about? It would help. ♥

Labels: faith, family, kids

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Why God loves little girls

I was searching online the other day because I wanted to try to find in the Bible where it mentions anything about God, creativity, and loving those who use their talents. That's another post now, because I found this instead: "Why God Loves Little Boys."

Okay, it's innocuous enough, God loves little boys for their eagerness, pride, wit, and "into their hands he has placed the future of all living things." The illustration shows them fishing, boating, trying to catch something in a net. Fine. But check out the companion piece: "Why God Loves Little Girls." And seriously, I start to get very, very angry.

Because apparently, God wants little girls to sit around and pick flowers all day, and "to dance and sing and giggle and wink." Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat?! I wish I was making this up. I was expecting maybe something about little girls being mothers and teachers of the future generations, about growing to be strong women. What I wanted to find was basically the same wording as the boys' one, but with "girls" in there. Didn't God also give girls eagerness, pride, wit, strong bodies to move and play and work with? Apparently not.

I know this is an older print, but it's only from the 80's! I pray that nobody hangs this in their kid's room, and teaches them that God expects nothing from them but to look pretty and dainty. I have nothing against "rainbows and dimples and bees", but for God's sake, give a girl some credit. Maybe I need to make my own poster about what I pray God really feels about Little Girls....

Labels: kids

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My red crayon

We went to the Crayola factory this week, and darned if not too much has changed since this awesome Sesame Street clip from the 80s. I have wanted to visit the factory since then.

When they were making the crayons, the demonstrator let all the kids come up and put the wrappers on, and then asked if any parents wanted to do it. Of course I jumped right up! I said, “I thought you’d never ask!”

In my eagerness, I put my wrapper on backwards, so that you can see the stripes, but no name. The guy asked us if anyone did that, and to hold them up – I thought he was going to make us give them back! He said, "Now it’s your crayon! Name it whatever you want!" so the kids were all impressed with me that I beat the system.

♥ Squid squid squid squid squid: Season 38 of Sesame Street started last week; this bit of hilarity is from the season opener. The second I watched this, I knew it was going to be all over the internet. I just love the way Brian Williams relishes the word "squid." What a ham!

Labels: art, family, inspirations, kids, muppets

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at the lake

The kids went to Pennsylvania this weekend to visit their cousins (2+ hours, we're going to take it in stages next time), SLEPT OVER in Jude's bed (and didn't wet anything!), went on a boat, made s'mores, ate lots of pancakes, played with lots and lots of matchbox cars, had a singalong and got a preview of songs from Uncle Marc's new-CD-in-progress, and saw waterfalls. I have high hopes that this is going to help pave the way for more traveling.

♥ Our photos here
♥ Their cousins' pics here

Labels: family, kids

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by george, I think we've done it!

Remember this and this?

I'm proud to say... the kids are actually toilet-trained. Those of you who think this is no big deal have no idea what it's like to train three kids, all at the same time. It's freaking amazing.

No more diapers.
No more training pants, not even at night.
No more potties (they have to use the regular toilet because I refuse to clean them anymore). We tried to sell them off at our garage sale.

My advice for anyone embarking on this adventure...

Be really consistent; they're pretty confused about the whole thing so doing everything the same way, every time, helps get it through their heads.

Don't be afraid to put your foot down. I just said one day, "Oh, we don't wear diapers in the house during the day anymore." And they said, "Oh, okay!" and it wasn't an issue. Same as, "We're not wearing diapers at school now," and the ever-popular, "When this package of training pants* is gone, we will not buy any more. So if you don't want pee in your bed, you'll get out of it and go to the bathroom. And we'll help you."

Get a potty that is all in one piece. The ones that come apart so you can clean them? Not good. Because that means pee can get into the cracks, leak out, whatever. In addition to the FIVE potty seats we had around the house, we still have two seats that fit over the seat of the toilet (because my kids are on the small side and are still convinced they will fall in). One is one solid piece of plastic. I love it. The other has a puffy seat, handles, comes apart. It almost always has pee between the layers and I'm always cleaning it so the bathroom doesn't smell like a hamster cage; one day when Paul had the power washer out I made him hose it down because I couldn't stand it. Do yourself a favor and don't buy this.

And finally...

Be patient, and pray a lot. It is one full year since we started training with the kids; I pray it doesn't take that long for anyone else. But be patient with them, and especially boys, biologically their bladder is not as developed as girls their same age, so they may not know when it's full (which was the case in our house). Try to praise them as much as you can when they do something right, and try not to make a big deal out of the accidents. In our house, treating nighttime pees and changes of bedding like it's no big deal has really helped the kids be less tense about the whole thing.

And yes, I still want to have a Potty Party for them to celebrate.

* I know I said we wouldn't use training pants; we used them very sparingly, like at night when we were teaching them to get up and use the toilet, because they couldn't handle taking on and off diapers by themselves. I didn't like using them. :)

Labels: family, kids

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Gifted?

More reading I've been doing lately, in between going through my collection of old Ellery Queen novels, has been stuff like The Survival Guide for Parents of Gifted Kids. Paul picked this up from the library with Sophie in mind, but reading through it actually put some things about Angela in a different light for me. Regarding her behavioral issues, some of the points hit home -- for intstance, acting up out of boredom (which she has freely admitted to me) and her stubborn need to do things her own way, and the fact that she tries to negotiate with me about them like a little lawyer. (She's 3.) While I'm not labeling her anything, it's certainly opened our eyes to a wider scope of what we might be dealing with here.

As for Miss S., we've known since before she could talk that we were dealing with a kid that was off the charts. At her one-year checkup, she knew all her colors, body parts, and about 10 shapes. She taught herself to read at two, can write, draws constantly, can find all 50 states on a map.... we just keep trying to answer her questions and feed her thirst for knowledge, and make sure she gets outside a ton and plays away from books. (She's 4 now.) The other night at dinner we were talking about opposites with the kids. After a couple of minutes we had gotten through all the obvious ones, and I said, "Tasty.....?" Sophie thought for a minute and said, "Inedible."

And Petey.... I think Peter is biding his time. He's been working on seeing how far he can jump and pretending he's cooking the family gourmet meals; a habit that I for one want to encourage. :)

Labels: kids

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The Strong-Willed Child

I have been trying to put into practice two tenets of "The Strong-Willed Child" (which mostly applies to Miss Angela). One is that I pray for the strength to be able to SHAPE her will, and not BREAK it. God gave her this amazing spirit, and entrusted me to be her mama. I want her to be the unique person she is meant to be, but not at the expense of everyone's else's sanity. I'm in charge, not a three-year-old, and she knows it, but she's the one when everyone else is playing nicely, will look around and decide things aren't quite exciting for her and need a little stirring up. (I have seen her say, sweetly, "Oh, Peter?" and when he turned to look at her, smiled while she punched him in the face.) Not that Angela is a bully, far from it. Most of the time she's quite sweet and kind-hearted. But when there's trouble, she usually is the one stirring it up, and then is difficult to stop.

While the book recommends spanking the child with a paddle, and then putting it up on display so that they will be reminded of this and that You Are Boss, I just can't do that. I am not a wuss - in fact, we are quite strict with our kids - I just grew up without being spanked and I think that's the way to go. So the other concept I've taken from this book is: I need to find some immediate consequence that bothers Angela enough to deter her from bad behavior. For Sophie, giving her a look and saying sternly, "Do you want to sit in the corner?" is enough to make her stop whatever she's doing; actually going in the corner has her in tears because she wants so badly to make us happy (this is the kind of kid I was, btw). Angela could care less! One time I completely lost it and was screaming myself red in the face at her, and she laughed. Sophie would have been sobbing. That's another point in this book I appreciated; it's not that we're bad parents, or lazy, or whatever. It's that Angela's completely different in her behavior than the other two. And we need other tactics. She's not fond of time-outs, and we do those, but we're still thinking up something else we can use as a deterrent, especially at bedtime.

As for me growing up, we had The Wooden Spoon, which Mom would sort of swat at you with but it didn't hurt because you could always run faster than she did. I remember one day rolling my eyes at her and saying, "It doesn't hurt, Mom," like, come on, you have to do better than that! And she explained about our friend's house, where the kids wait till their Dad gets home from work and he takes off his belt and whacks them with it if their Mom reports they've done something wrong. Would we rather do it that way instead? Because Mom could talk to Daddy about it and work something out if we'd prefer that. No, no, that was quite okay, we reassured her. The Spoon was just fine, and hey, did she need us to set the table or take out the garbage or something? And by the way, Mom, you're looking lovely today.

Labels: family, kids

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Gerb-o-matic

We're officially on vacation this week, which means lots of fun day trips with the kiddos. Tuesday they saw an exhibit of Steve Gerberich's work that mixed machines and art, with buttons at kid height to push to get them going. The sculptures were full of toys and everyday objects that the kids could recognize; they loved pointing things out and seeing them move. Angela and Sophie's favorite was a machine that played music and contained the inner workings of a cuckoo clock. I really dug a sculpture where everything in it was blue - rubber ducks, hair curlers, flip flops, and the centerpiece - a child's chair in the shape of Cookie Monster. You can see a clip of an interview with him here. The sculptures look scarier than they really are - more zany than anything else. The kids also really dug that they could spot a doll of James Brown - yes, what discerning kiddos I have!

Note: as cool as this exhibit was, I was rather annoyed that the museum's website did not mention that due to construction, almost HALF the museum was closed at the time for renovation. We saw enough to interest three preschoolers, but just barely. The fact that the rock and mineral exhibit hadn't changed for 25 years (when I'd been there last, I like nostalgia), and this art exhibit, kept me quiet.

Labels: art, kids

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A reminder

I ripped this out of an old O Magazine last week and have stuck it up above my desk as a reminder to not beat myself up (or those around me). I am currently neck-deep in work, permanently stuck in Week 11 (out of 12) in Walking in This World, and we've moved into the last phase of toilet-training: NO DIAPERS AT NIGHT.

Does that strike terror into your heart? It did mine. And while I was hoping that the kids would catch on quickly to the "ooh, waking up in a puddle of pee is not fun", and they have, what they have not caught onto is the ability to do something about it; ie, wake up, get out of bed, and pee in the toilet. It's been 2 weeks now and they sort of get it and sort of don't. We may have to face the fact that at least the twins are just not physically ready to be dry all night. In which case we will go back to (gulp) pullups, and we will do a LOT less laundry. And Mama and Daddy can get much much much more sleep than we are now. And we'll all try again after recitals are over in June.

Labels: kids

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You say it's your birthday... it's her birthday too

One week ago (it's been birthday party central around here!) it was Peter and Angela's birthday -- they turned the big THREE. THREE! How the heck can they be three already?!

Maybe part of my astonishment is due to the fact that there are large sections of their early childhood that I cannot remember anything about. I have huge blank sections of memory, I'm guessing from a combination of my post-partum depression and sheer exhaustion. (Go check the archives if you want to read the adventures of a family with preemie twins born 10 weeks early, with a one-year-old at home. I don't!) Luckily, nowadays things are much happier and slightly less exhausting, so I will share a few favorite snippets:

Peter LOVES Schoolhouse Rock. He insists that in Science Rock they are singing about a "Kermit" of electricity and even after we explained that it's a current, he will sing it extra-loud when we get to that part, and then give a belly-laugh that sounds like it's coming from an old man. He has thankfully switched from "No can!" as his catch-phrase to "I think not!" We also will hear, "Angewa! Yeave me ayone!" at all hours of the day or night. But if she's not around, he asks and asks until she comes into the room.

Angela can't leave him - or anyone else - alone. Anything Petey does, it must be good, and she wants to be doing it too. When the lights are off and it's bedtime, we hear her leading the singing over the baby monitor -- "Never Smile at a Crocodile" and selections from "Big Big World." She recently got glasses and we didn't think it was possible for one little girl to get more glamorous, but she totally is (and she knows it, too.) Angela's latest thing is to say "I love you!" to everyone around the table, in the car, wherever we are, and today, she added "I love myself!" I ran over and hugged her and said, "YES, Angela. Don't ever forget that." Life lessons, from a three-year-old.

So here's to my muffins, my big surprise, my daily dose of hugs. I love you more every day, and I pray you stay just as sweet as ever... and please God, keep taking naps, and just get up yourself when you need to pee at night and let Mama sleep, okay?

Labels: kids

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Guest artist: Sophia Grace

Sophie is four years old today.

When Sophie was two, she taught herself to read.

When Sophie was three, she started writing.

I can't wait to see what this year will bring. I love her more every day. Especially when she draws me stuff like this:

Labels: art, kids

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Packaging Girlhood

I just finished the most amazing book: Packaging Girlhood: Rescuing our Daughters from Marketers' Schemes. I highly recommend this for any mom or teacher (and isn't that what all moms are anyway?) Plain and simple, the authors break down how girls today are targeted by marketers every step of the way, through what they see on TV to what the covers of board games have on them (by the way, not ONE had a girl winning the game.)

In our house, we don't watch commercials, even the ones on PBS. :) Although some of my sitters have been aghast to hear that my kids don't watch Disney films, the only thing my kids have seen is Mary Poppins. (No offense to you if you like them, I think 4 is far too young to pretend your prince needs to rescue you. Not to mention every "princess" in the movies has no mother, who has been conveniently killed off because she interferes with the plot. But I digress.) And while I thought that I was being a little overprotective, after reading this book, I'm glad we've taken that approach.

The book points out how "Girl Power" has been taken over by marketers to mean that you have the power to make yourself attractive to the opposite sex. Or that you can buy things. Your choices are pink, sparkly pink, and purple (don't believe me, go read the chapter excerpt on Amazon and see the research these women did.) Your choice is to be either one of the guys, or to try to get one. Seems cut and dried, but once you start looking, you see examples of this everywhere.

Luckily, the authors also point out ways to have good discussions with your kids, as early as preschool, and to let them be aware of what's around them. They never say "don't be a cheerleader, play the flute, like ballet, be girly", but they do point out that girls have a billion other options (play soccer, play the drums, take up kickboxing, and you can still be girly). They help you show your girls that marketers are trying to manipulate them, and that they are smarter than that. I've taken it a little further and make sure we mention everything in front of Petey too; this way he grows up understanding that girls (especially his sisters) are more than just pretty faces.

One of the things we do is just comment on things. Like the kids play dress up, and Angela yells, "I'm a fireman!" So I tell her, "Well, you're a fire fighter, because both men and women are brave and put out fires, right?" Or we watch Curious George, and I say, "Wow, isn't that great that Professor Wiseman is such a smart woman! Do you think she's a good scientist? Do only men get to be scientists?" And we talk about it.

Do you see this in your own kids? What do you tell them? Do you think this is a bunch of hooey and I should just put in The Little Mermaid DVD already and shut up?

Some more great reading:
The Paper Bag Princess: We're loving this book. What makes a princess a princess? For certain, it's not her clothes.

What's Wrong With Cinderella? A must-read for every mom. Because as the author tells her daughter, "It's just, honey, Cinderella doesn't really do anything."

Commercial-Free Childhood: Great site that shows how many strange places marketers are trying to get your kids' attention and build brand loyalty at a very young age.

Labels: kids, motherhood

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All you need is love, love...

We take the same pic every year. See the kids grow up:

(2005)

(2006)

Labels: kids

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How we do it

The following is from a note I wrote to my Walking In This World group, which has a few mamas in it who are trying to make more time for their art in a schedule that's already jam-packed. I figured I would share what we do in the hopes that it helps someone out. Feel free to add your own advice in the comments. :)

..................

LOTS OF UNSOLICITED ADVICE TO FOLLOW - FEEL FREE TO PICK/CHOOSE/IGNORE ;)

Have you considered hiring a sitter for Sunday afternoons? We have sitters (High school girls) come in for 2 hours every night just to help me feed the kids and get them off to bed, b/c my husband teaches music classes every night until 10ish.(I can do it by myself, but it's difficult with the three under 4 and trying to be supermom has gotten me sick many times from exhaustion.)

Anyway, so my kids are familiar with the girls (not to mention Grandma!), so sometimes we have one of them come on a weekend afternoon for a few hours to play with the kiddos while we get our own work done without them around. I have painted, written letters, and just napped while they've come over. And then I'm refreshed when it's time to make dinner and see everyone again. Or sometimes, we just order a pizza so I don't have to cook. Or we have pancakes for dinner. :) We pay $8 an hour for the girls to be there for 3 small kids, and we're right there in the house in case they need us for any reason. This seems to work out well for everyone.

I also think that you need to make sure that your husband understands how important your art, and time to yourself, is. You can ALWAYS say, "His work is important!" but so are you. My husband was incredibly supportive while I was doing The Artist's Way (still is), but I still have to point out to him that we almost always get a sitter so he can work, not the other way around. :)

Not sure if financially this is possible, but since you are working, you might want to look into hiring cleaning help. I know this sounds extreme - it did to me when my husband suggested it, I thought, good lord! I can clean my own house! We don't have funds for that! But we wound up spending at least one day every weekend doing nothing but cleaning the house. And that just sucked. (Keep in mind also that my husband's studio is part of the house, and we have 75 people coming and going and using our bathroom each week. :) So we have a super-nice lady come every other week to clean the house and it is SO WORTH IT TO ME to not have to spend all my time scrubbing the stove top or cleaning the toilets and whatnot. Anyway, you might want to look into it - figure what your time is worth, what your sanity is worth, and see if this could possibly be an option for you.

Regarding bedtimes - this is the thing that saves me - we are incredibly regimented with our bedtime procedure. I have had other moms tell me, "My guys will never do that." Ours do becuase we MAKE them do it. And don't take no for an answer. I am so fiercely protective of my evening time (for my sanity) that bedtimes are strictly enforced. :) They also know the routine so well that I don't dare skip a step or do it out of order, or they call me on it.

My three all go to bed by 7:30, 8 at the very latest. By 6:30, I mention that we all need to start cleaning up. They all have to help put away their toys themselves, because I can't possibly do it all myself (the sitter helps too, but we mainly want the kids to do it themselves.) Then they have to try the potty, and everyone gets into diapers/pullups and into their PJs. Everyone should be dressed and everything put away by 7ish. Then they each get to choose a picture book and we all snuggle on the couch and we read to them, or what happens when a sitter is there is that she reads and I run upstairs and make sure everything's ready - make the bed that Peter's flung blankets all around the room, or fill their humidifiers, etc. Weekend nights when Daddy is there we get the laptop and watch 1/2 hour of something - the Muppet Show, vintage Sesame Street clips from YouTube, Classical Baby, Schoolhouse Rock.

By the time the books are read, we all go upstairs. They know they all have to walk up - not get carried - or they go straight to bed. We brush teeth, go into Peter and Angela's room and say (or sing) our prayers, and then do our "thank you God"s where they tell us things they're happy about, and we ask God to watch over our family members/friends who are sick. Everyone smooches each other, it's 7:30 and time for the sitter to go home. The twins hop in bed with threats from me of what will happen if they get out, :) and I close the door.

Sophie tries a last pee, then she hops in bed and tells me Three Nice Things about her day, which is kind of a gratitude list. We read one more story - very very short, like a poem or something, switch off her flashlight, smooch, and she's done. If she's not sleepy, she reads in bed - she has a flashlight that's easy for her to turn on and off. By then, it's 7:40. They mostly stay down for the evening, and I have until 10:30 when Paul is finished to do my own work. They also know that after they go to bed, Mama is painting. And they're interested in that too, especially if they know that they get to see it the next day.

Anyway, don't beat yourself up, and don't give up either - you're doing great things for yourself just by trying to work through the book and by trying to learn more about yourself and your art.

Hang in there!

love, Elena

Labels: art, family, kids, motherhood

french toast girl

Crafty

Everyone's birthday's coming up very soon - Sophie at the end of the month (4) and Petey and Angela at the very beginning of March (3). I asked them if they would like me to make them special rag dolls they could dress up and play with, and they got quite excited. Especially when I told them I'd make each doll look like one of them!

So - here's the big question to those of you out there who make toys on a regular basis - what kinds of materials do you recommend? Did you ever make a doll you could throw in the washer? Do you know of any good (free would be lovely) patterns that are not too complicated?